If you’re my mom or my close friends, you’d know that Matt was away at training all week outside of Philly.

If you don’t know, it is because I am absolutely paranoid and convinced myself that somehow my life would become a scene in a scary movie since I am -gasp! – alone. Well, actually, my mother puts these ideas in my head since she calls fifty five times each night to make sure I am okay and then reminds me to check the lock on the door, the locks on the windows and and to basically stay indoors at all times.

Soooo…who is the crazy one now?

Anyways, since he is now home I can shout out to the world that I survived. And that the hammer I placed next to my bed was only picked up once, after that damn dog upstairs dropped his bone in the middle of the night. I really wish I had a webcam to see how ridiculous I must have looked, yielding a hammer with my eyes closed at 3 a.m.

However…I did do some actual damage on the rest of the house – as well as at our gym – during the day. I mean, while the cat’s away, the mouse will:

1) Break out all of her paint supplies, use the kitchen table as her own extra-large palette while forgetting to put newspaper on the floor to catch the millions of drops of spilled paint.

2) Spill pricey protein powder all over the floor while attempting Oh She Glow’s Protein Peanut Butter. Since we justified the $30 price tag by breaking it down to only $1 a day, let’s just say we have to subtract about a week from that justification now.

3) Finally go through thousands of wedding photos in an attempt to post all pictures to Facebook, write various wedding blog posts AND submit photos to her photographer for a much-delayed wedding book.

Because like…it’s not like our one-year anniversary is next week or anything! Needless to say, I didn’t get very far…I spent way too much time laughing and remincing to make anyyyy sort of dent in any wedding-photo plans.

4) Go to the gym to “tone up” after a run and then forget all of the set exercises her personal trainer husband taught her to do. Do you pair bi’s and tri’s together…or is it bi’s and back? Tri’s and chest? Where the heck are bi’s and tri’s even located? Why are these 5 lbs weights so heavy?

After really straining myself and most likely making up weight lifting moves, I decided to take it to the machines. Where I then went to make quite the scene while attempting to hook on a different pull-y thing to the pull-y thing machine. I didn’t realize that there was nothing to stop the cord from springing up and making a really loud snapping noise once you detach the various pull-y thing that was hooked onto it. I know I now sound just as ridiculous and stupidly girly as I looked that day, sooooo I’ll just stop.

5) After a strenuous and embarrassing work out, tackle the bathroom shower tiles while IN the shower, since that makes total sense. Because if you’re going to get in the shower, run water get soap everywhere and put some major elbow grease into those tiles, you might as well just take a shower right afterwards.

About 45 minutes and a now really high water bill later (sorry Planet Earth!) both me and our shower tiles were really clean…and reeked like Lysol.

At least two things are clean for Matt’s arrival! Although the blue acrylic paint has yet to come out of my hair or out of my fingernails…

Have a great weekend everyone!